TraditionsX – Recovery Cartoons

Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends on AA/NA unity.

Practicing the principles of Tradition 1 helps create an atmosphere in which everyone can feel welcomed and safe at meetings and in the program. With the spirit of Tradition 1, I try to focus on our similarities rather than our differences, both as individuals and between different groups. Similarities include different aspects of our addiction and our recovery. An atmosphere of unity ensures that we all are welcome and considered equal regardless of age, race, sexual identity, religion, or lack of religion. Knowing that each of us is no better or no worse than any other member strengthens the group unity. Through this inclusion, the person walking into their first meeting is just as important, if not more so, than the old-timer with many years of sobriety. Both individuals can have important contributions including reminding the group of the fresh pain of active addiction to the knowledge and experiences that come with long-term recovery. Those with difficult personalities or mental health disorders can also contribute to the group. I need to be willing to get past my own bias and listen to the messages everyone shares.

For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority — a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

Conscience and anonymity are the principles that shape Tradition 2 and our way of life within 12-Step recovery service. Having a group conscience gives voice to all members and gives trust and dignity to our decisions. These decisions are made by voting and carried by simple majority, with all members of a group having an equal vote. We can rely on the God of our understanding as we believe in the process of group consciousness. Tradition 2 encourages all to feel free to participate in the decisions of the group. When I follow Tradition 2, I can feel safe to act in the spirit of unity and speak my conscience with an attitude of love. I can hear the voice of my Higher Power through the collective voice of the group and the decisions that the group makes. If decisions go against my opinions, I can practice acceptance for the will of the majority in the group. If unable to accept decisions, rather than hold on to anger, I can either let my resentments go or find a new group. I feel included when I am asked to be of service and feel respected when allowed to share my views. Welcoming newcomers might be the most important thing we can do in service and including them in decisions helps them feel like they belong. The collective conscience of all outlined in Tradition 2 is important no matter if we are long-time members or new to the group.

The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking/using.

The implied decision of Step 3 is to continue with the program to the best of our ability. This includes working the 12 Steps with a sponsor, going to meetings regularly, striving to improve our characters, making amends to those we’ve harmed and helping others. Willingness is the key principle of Step 3, and the decision is a commitment to our ongoing recovery. If I believe that the God of my understanding has guided me to this point in my journey, then I can trust that my continued efforts will result in greater benefits and growth. These efforts are not only directed to enhance my chances of continued sobriety, but also help me follow my conscience in all areas of my life. Practicing Step 3 is about trying to do the next right thing in all circumstances. For me, it can be as easy as picking up trash that I notice, or it can be more involved such as volunteering my time and energy to worthwhile causes. In practicing Step 3, I strive towards making choices that feel right to me and result in my feeling good about being a productive, responsible member of society.

The more willing I am to work Step 3, the more I realize this involves turning my will and life over to the God of my understanding. A short, powerful Third Step prayer I was taught to help me on this journey is: God, take my will and my life, guide me in my recovery, show me how to live. The only requirement for membership in the 12-Step programs is a desire to stop drinking and drugging. This requirement is unconditional as explained in the Third Tradition without any catches. You do not have to admit you are an alcoholic or addict nor believe in Higher Power. Identity and membership are the principles of the Third Tradition, you are a member when you say you are, period. You do not have to have a sponsor, do the 12 Steps, or follow the many other suggestions. Having a desire to stop drinking and drugging begins our membership, and these other practices can strengthen efforts to be successful. Even if unsuccessful, members are strongly encouraged to keep coming back and keep trying. Many of us tried and failed several times before recovery really began to stick. Open mindedness, willingness, faith, and courage in our ability to love and carry the message to everyone is the basis of the Third Tradition.

Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or AA/ NA as a whole.

The principle of autonomy in Tradition 4 gives each group the freedom to act on their own to express an atmosphere of recovery the way the members of that group choose. Each group is an individual entity from other groups and the program as a whole, relying on its own conscience of its members to guide decisions. Decisions might include diversity in the formats of the meeting, readings, closing prayers, having coffee or other refreshments and other ways to enhance the atmosphere of recovery. The Fourth Tradition frees us from judging other groups that operate a little differently than we prefer. If the members decide collectively to manage a meeting in a unique manner, the Fourth Tradition protects this right, as long as it’s not seen as detrimental to other groups or the program as a whole.

Each group has but one primary purpose—to carry the message to the alcoholic/addict who still suffers.

Our primary purpose as individuals is to stay clean and sober and help others, whereas the primary purpose of the group is to carry the message of hope to anyone who still suffers. Those suffering could include newcomers, someone returning from a relapse, someone on the brink of relapse, or anyone going through emotional, physical, or spiritual difficulties. The message of hope is that anyone can stop drinking and drugging, lose the desire to drink and drug and find a new way to live. What do we get out of this message individually? My sponsor, Art, explained to me the greatest gift of the program was not something he gained, but something the program took away- the desire and obsession to use drugs and alcohol. That obsession ruled my life for many years. When I stay focused on our primary purpose, I have the opportunity for a happy life every day I choose to focus on my recovery. By successfully staying clean and sober and helping others to do so, I feel connected to my Higher Power and life. I have hope and feel free, that is freedom from active addiction. With feelings of hope and freedom I can experience a sense of happiness like I’ve never known.

An AA/NA group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the NA name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, or prestige divert us from our primary purpose.

Tradition 6 teaches us to be true to our primary purpose of the 12-step program and to ourselves. In meetings or committee work when we endorse any outside organizations besides our 12-step program, we divert the focus from the program. This includes similar 12-Step programs, such as AA should not endorse NA and vice versa because they are separate organizations. The program should never endorse clubhouses that might hold 12-Step meetings, treatment programs that treat substance use disorders, churches, community centers, hospitals, and other organizations even if meetings are held there. The 12-Step meetings just rent the space to meet, but do not promote these organizations. Likewise, the program should not endorse any causes. Taking a position on any outside issues can alienate people who do not agree with that cause. This even includes related issues, such as alcohol

prohibition, drinking age limits or drug legalization initiatives. The program does not officially support or oppose these initiatives and it would be inappropriate to discuss these issues at meetings. It is fine to support whatever organizations you want outside of the meetings, but not at the meetings or as a representative of the program. Individuals both in and outside of the program need to recognize these issues have nothing to do with not taking a drink of drug today. Any other priorities beyond our primary purpose can be a distraction or diversion from our efforts to stay clean and sober and help others. Some of these other organizations do good work, for sure, but they also have business interests that fall outside of our goals of recovery. Issues of money, property and prestige can divert the group from the focus on the primary purpose. Although financial gain and fame seem like they could benefit the program, the pursuit of these could betray the groups in the long run. The Sixth Tradition is similar to a group version of the Tenth Step, where we take a regular inventory to stay on tract regarding the primary purpose. The quest for fame and fortune can trigger my insecurities and move my priorities away from recovery.

Every NA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

While drinking and drugging, most of us were dependent on others financially due to the unmanageability of managing money in our addiction. My financial issues included the exorbitant amount of money I wasted buying alcohol and drugs, the jobs I lost, legal fees, and other poor choices and mismanagement that led to my economic chaos. Addiction took everything away from me and then I took it from other people to supplement my drug and alcohol use and as a matter of survival. I would call my mother with tales of woe, seeking assistance with the mess I had made of my financial matters. I depended on my mother, begging for her to help support my needs for, food, shelter, bills, and other financial burdens resulting from my alcohol and drug use. In my own mind, I blamed my economic situation on bad luck or being the victim of unfortunate circumstances. Becoming more self-supporting is an important part of my new way of life as I practice the principles of the Seventh Tradition. By depending on Higher Power, my sponsor, and the groups, I’ve become more independent from my addiction. By being responsible, I have taken back control of my life and hopefully handle the future. I have learned to care for myself and meet my own needs without depending on other people. Merely not drinking and drugging gave me the biggest pay raise of my life. I have been rewarded with confidence, dignity, trust, and the freedom to make my own decisions. I now can afford a nice place to live, a good truck to drive, I’m able to get my teeth fixed if needed, practicing the principle of self-sufficiency in my recovery.

Alcoholics/Narcotics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers.

We have no 12-Step program professionals, no staff psychiatrists, psychologists, doctors, lawyers, or counselors. The power of recovery is based on one alcoholic or addict helping another and the fact that we can do together what none of us were able to do alone. I need to remind myself of this fact being a mental health nurse and a college professor. When I received my PhD with a focus on humor and addiction, my NA friends lovingly referred to me as Dr. Dope Fiend. Truth is I’m just one drink or drug from a living hell. There are plenty of us professionals that have problems with substances and find help in 12-Step programs. Addiction does not discriminate between education levels, professions or economic status and just laughs at how much we think we know. Tradition 8 commits to all members being non-professional as equal members trying to recover and freely giving to each other. Members don’t need any degrees, certificates, or special coursework to carry the message of recovery, only our experience, strength, and hope. Our stories are our training, and our recovery highlights our success. Members should never be singled out as having special knowledge of recovery because of their profession or having any expertise other than one member helping another.

AA/NA, as such, ought never be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

Tradition 9 addresses specialized volunteer service work that members perform, usually on a rotating basis. 12-Step boards and committees are organized for the groups to be able to communicate with each other, provide services to members and the community and make decisions together. These committees ultimately serve the groups through representation and by providing reports. Committees include area, regional and world service committees, all functioning with input from individual groups. Some groups are more involved and better informed, but all can participate in program-wide decisions if they choose. There are also Hospitals & Institutions, Public Information, Literature, Convention, Special Events, and Policy committees, among others. Never be Organized refers to not being managed, owned, or controlled by anyone, but through volunteering from members. Tradition 2 emphasized that our leaders are trusted servants, they do not govern. The idea of Tradition 9 is to try to avoid being distracted by personalities and try to stay focused on serving the groups and individual members. These boards and committees do have structure, planning, and predictability, as the work needs to stay on course and get done. Open, clear communication leads to accountability in service and efforts are made to always stay connected to groups and the collective group conscience.

Alcoholics/Narcotics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the AA/NA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.

Tradition 10 is designed to protect the reputation of the 12-Step programs from becoming involved in any arguments, fights, or controversies, even ones that seem like good causes or worthy endeavors. The goal of Tradition 10 is to keep the message of recovery simple, clear and on target with our primary purpose. We can’t afford to risk the program’s reputation, survival, and well-being of members over an issue not directly related to the program’s message of recovery. That goal should always focus on staying clean and sober and helping others to recover. Certain issues might seem related to staying clean, sober, and helping others until we take a closer look. An example might be supporting the organization Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD). What could be more important than our mothers and more relevant to recovery than the crusade against drunk driving? However, Tradition 10 makes it clear that the 12-Step recovery programs have no official position regarding MADD. Our primary purpose is

not to support mothers nor crusade against drunk drivers. Prospects to 12-Step recovery might not have had the best of relationships with their mothers or they might feel unwelcome to the program if they were ever arrested for drunk driving. MADD solicits donations from the public and has recognized leaders. What if a scandal hit this organization? How would 12-Step recovery’s reputation survive if it endorsed any outside issues including MADD? Tradition 10 even makes clear that the 12-Step program has no opinion on the best way to recover, but rather the 12-Step programs are a path we follow and works for us. Distraction from the primary purpose and having opinions on related and unrelated issues would risk alienating members, especially the newcomers. Survival of the fellowship is more important than any cause.

Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films.

The most powerful attraction to 12-Step recovery is those successfully staying clean and sober as a result of the program. People stand up and take notice when they see people with drinking and drug problems get clean and sober and change into contributing members of society. These successful individuals follow a similar path that includes attending meetings regularly, getting and using a sponsor, and working the 12 Steps. Beyond remaining abstinent they also try to help others find recovery and strive to live life on a spiritual basis. We want the public to respect 12-Step programs and view them as a resource to recover from alcohol and drug use problems. Tradition 11 teaches us that we can’t make promises or promotional claims about the 12 Steps or present ourselves as representatives of 12-Step recovery. A temptation once getting clean and sober is to announce to the world this good news. We can certainly feel proud of ourselves and acknowledge these life-changing accomplishments. Most people are not impressed that we stopped doing something that they view as maladaptive behavior to begin with. From my point of view, I finally reached a point in life where I successfully stopped drinking or drugging and consider this fact my greatest achievement. This miracle happened thanks to the !2 Step program and a lot of help I received from other people just like me. By practicing Tradition 11 and personal anonymity, I can set aside my desire for recognition and approval of others for my success.

Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.

Anonymity allows us to come together in unity to fulfill the primary purpose of the program. We can even come together between different 12-Step programs through mutual respect and keeping the principles of recovery before personalities. Anonymity protects members from being known as alcoholics or drug addicts. Most individuals use their first name and last initial to remain anonymous, such as the co-founder of AA, Bill W. or the founder of NA, Jimmy K. It is important that we feel safe at meetings and that what we share about will not be exposed to the public. Anonymity does not guarantee privacy or confidentiality, therefore intimate details of situations are better saved to one-on-one conversations with our trusted sponsor. Still, we can share our feelings and struggles during meetings and get some relief. I give and receive help through both sharing and listening. I try to remember, “Pain shared is pain divided, joy shared is joy multiplied.” It does me good to talk about what I’m going through, expressing my feelings, and then getting support from fellow group members, even if I avoided revealing details. This way I’ve shared my needs for empathy and allows others to offer love and support. The power comes through our feelings, rather than our words when we share from our heart.

The sex/dating/relationship tradition

If the Thirteenth Step is about sex, then it makes sense that the Thirteenth Tradition is about group sex. Many of us struggle with our sexuality, especially when we look back to when we were drinking and drugging. Although drugs and alcohol may have reduced some of my inhibitions with potential partners, being intoxicated led me into some unsavory situations that I regret. Finding a new way of living in this area can be difficult in recovery due to years of poor habits, decisions, and patterns of behavior. I needed to look at my sexual behaviors and decide in what ways I need to change. It has become obvious to me that many of my past behaviors did not serve my greater good. Intimate relationships can lead me to emotional pain and feelings of shame and rejection. I need to show respect and understand that I could harm anyone that I date by taking romance lightly. Working the Steps and discussions with my sponsor has helped me come to terms with my past and take an honest look at myself and my behaviors with romantic partners. I lacked self-esteem and confidence while drinking and drugging and usually only settled

into relationships that didn’t take much risk on my part. I seemed to end up with individuals that were just as needy as myself, if not more so. I had some experience with sexual activities but knew very little about intimacy. Even in my first marriage I was lost in my addiction and failed as a true partner. In recovery, I’ve discovered that Intimacy builds over time as I connect with my partner and grow closer to them. I’ve been able to experience relationships in which I truly cared about my partner and felt more and more comfortable with them and myself. I’ve been able to experience both physical and emotional bonding while together, and better able to establish healthy boundaries. The relationships I’ve experienced in recovery have been much more rewarding than what I remember from my drinking and drugging days. I’ve discovered intimacy beyond physical attraction. I’ve also learned to part ways in a mature, respectful way with lovers when the relationship fell short of either of our desires or expectations. Talking about my sexuality with my sponsor has helped me grow and mature in this area of my life. It is important for me to lay out all my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors regarding sex, intimacy, and partnership with my sponsor. By being honest I was able to get to a point where I really wanted an equal partner to share my life. When I met my wife, Beth, she had very similar goals. I am very grateful for the Steps, my sponsor, and my willingness to honestly examine this important area of my life. Some of my past sexual experiences may have lacked intimacy and might include behaviors I’d just as soon forget about and leave out of my recovery.